Apr. 19th, 2010

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I have never written much at all about the love of my life, but she's there, and real, and she really is the love of my life, and I of hers. Things have been very, very bad with us lately, in very large measure because she feels—rightly—that all the gender stuff got dumped on her and built up behind her back. She deserves better than that.

So I'm letting this journal go fallow, while I work on life with her. We have a lot to learn about what each other is like now, and about what our lives have been like in the long stretches apart from each other, and she needs to know that I'm not busily planting mines behind her that might go off at any moment. And for that matter I need to know that I really am giving life without drastic rewriting a full and fair opportunity, bringing together medical improvement, the unhappy but nonetheless resolving end of old projects, and all that stuff together with some real domestic partnership.

It hurt her very much to find this built up in secret. Part of what I owe her and our commitment is a public resolution to that. So, logging out here to see what we can do together.

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Ceri B.

April 2010

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