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Body: It's raining here today. Duh, it's winter in the Pacific Northwest, that's what it does here. It's not like the Southern California winter rains I grew up with: more persistent, gentler, more variable in detail. Today I had a little shopping to do, and wanted to update my sense of local distances so that I can do the daily walking required after my vascular surgery next month. (More about that in a post soon-ish.) I went out wearing my comfortable ugly knit cap, and the pitter patter of rain drops on it had a wonderful resonance. I felt very comfortable and happy in the midst of it.
Mind: Something I articulated late last night...I've tended to think of things like this grinding fatigue as something I'm stuck with as part of my overall condition, susceptible to change only in the way that, oh, my height or the sensitivity of my eyes that rules out contact lenses would be. Not exactly entirely fixed in place, but hard and awkward to change. (Harder, in some ways, than the gender stuff.) What drives my doctor's approach to the testosterone thing, though, is the insight that it's not like that at all. It's a specific thing that can be fixed - not a state of the body so much as an imbalance, likely externally triggered, more like an infection than like a matter of ontogeny.
And I like being able to think of my problems that way.
So I'm still really tired, but moving along. Should be able to kick the next round of things into action this week or next.
Mind: Something I articulated late last night...I've tended to think of things like this grinding fatigue as something I'm stuck with as part of my overall condition, susceptible to change only in the way that, oh, my height or the sensitivity of my eyes that rules out contact lenses would be. Not exactly entirely fixed in place, but hard and awkward to change. (Harder, in some ways, than the gender stuff.) What drives my doctor's approach to the testosterone thing, though, is the insight that it's not like that at all. It's a specific thing that can be fixed - not a state of the body so much as an imbalance, likely externally triggered, more like an infection than like a matter of ontogeny.
And I like being able to think of my problems that way.
So I'm still really tired, but moving along. Should be able to kick the next round of things into action this week or next.