Every decision we make opens a door while closing others. Usually it's trivial. I wear a blue top instead of a green one, big deal. Sometimes it's big. I turn hard to the left as my car careers toward the asshole who's cutting across my path and the right side of my car is demolished but I'm unharmed.
The trick, and I'm still working on sussing this out, is learning to let what might have been go. If I could have started estrogen at 13 I could look as good as Kim Petras. If I'd started at 20. If, if, if, it's all so bloody useless. Things are how they are, and I am who and what I am and THAT is what I have to build on. Not who I could have been if I'd been born physically female or started E 29 years ago.
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branchandroot
no subject
Date: 2009-09-16 12:32 am (UTC)The trick, and I'm still working on sussing this out, is learning to let what might have been go. If I could have started estrogen at 13 I could look as good as Kim Petras. If I'd started at 20. If, if, if, it's all so bloody useless. Things are how they are, and I am who and what I am and THAT is what I have to build on. Not who I could have been if I'd been born physically female or started E 29 years ago.
no subject
Date: 2009-09-16 01:32 am (UTC)